Well it seems that u definitely have anxiety issues as mentioned in initial part of ur query. BPAD or not,  but anxiety is definitely the first thing that requires addressing as it hampers a relaxed state of being. The most problems that a person BPAD have is when they r not able to handle the anxiety and react impulsively to deal with that mental unrest. BPAD is something that will require long term psychotherapy /counselling. But anxiety can be learned to deal with a combination of medicines and behavioural therapy.