Hello dear, I can somewhat understand the distress that you are carrying. Physical abuse in any relationship can have significantly adverse effects on mental health. I would recommend and urge you to seek a consultation with a Psychiatrist or a clinical psychologist near you. They can help understand the impact of such abuse on your mental health and form a plan for recovery... Do not hesitate in seeking a consultation. Mental health problems are very common, and one in every five individuals will require mental health assistance in their lifetime. Also many celebrities and persons have gone through mental illness, and have shown great career and life path after recovery.. Best wishes and lots of hope for you.