Your wife may be suffering from spasm of pelvic floor muscles causing pain and preventing penetration.
Next Steps
It is necessary to meet a urogynecologist who will perform a thorough physical examination and assess for spasm of pelvic muscles and other issues. If spasm is present, pelvic floor rehabilitation can be done to facilitate release of the spasm. If that does not work, several other treatments are available including using graded dilators and as a last resort botox injection to relax spasmed muscles