I have been experiencing extreme sadness. I feel so numb and empty. I feel like everything was so wrong and I always torture myself for every stupid things I do. I don't know who I am and what I want anymore. Now, in the past few weeks, I found myself cutting my own self with a blade or knife. It brings so much pleasure to me with every cuts and blood that comes out from my own. It became an addiction, every single night, I always cut myself and I can't no longer control it.