Yes I can imagine what you are going through. But there is a way out for sure.
It is important that you talk to people around .
The weight is concern from a health point of view also.
Have you checked your
thyroid levels?You may also have to do some more blood tests .
It is worthwhile to talk to a Psychiatrist who will assess you and diagnose you . The doctor will be able to help you to manage your issues with medications if required and through therapy.
Next Steps
Consult a Psychiatrist at the earliest and get an assessment done