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I urge everyone to read the post completely even though it is a long one.
I met this doctor first time yesterday at his clini***** ******* ****** ** ** **** ****** ***** ********** ********** **** ******* **** ********
I urge everyone to read the post completely even though it is a long one.
I met this doctor first time yesterday at his clinic for a back pain issue. I had looked up doctors on Sports Med and got his credentials from there. Given the week coincided with Ganesh Chaturthi, his appointment roster was light and there was no waiting at his clinic, and I was the only patient at that time at his clinic. I had a terrible experience, and I am writing this to ensure other patients who see him should not suffer *** **** *************** *** *** ***** ** ****** ** **** ******* * *** ******* ****** ***** ***** ** ******** ** **** *** *** ****** ** ****** *** *** ****** ******* *** ***** **** ** ***** ***** ** ****** ***** ****** ******* ***** ** ******** *** **** *** ******** *** ****** ******** ** *** *** ******** ** *** ****** I entered his chamber, he started his barrage of moral policing. For reference, please read the details of his comments/questions –
1) First, he started with all my personal details including very unnecessary details like my hometown, cities I have stayed in, different jobs, different projects in my job, whether I cook etc., while intimating and judging me at every instance. It was like a stress interview where I was constantly being cross questioned on every reply. For instance, why do you need to do data mining, what do you achieve by data mining, why this, why that while his tone being dismissive and demeaning towards me and my replies. While I tried to ask him how this is relevant for diagnosis for my medical condition, he replied that as you can see around, I am the only patient now so he can talk.
2) He then moved to my daily personal routine asking why I need to meditate 3 times a day *** ***** ** ******** **** * ****** ***** ******* ** ******* ******* ***** * ***** * **** Completely uncalled for advice in response to which I could only utter that all religions are equal to me.
3) He kept probing me on my meditation schedule and his continued line of questing was suggestive of something being wrong with me in life that I needed to meditate so many times during the day. His questions included Do I fall off while walking? How much stress do I have that I need to meditate multiple times a day? He threw in a free advice that I should not focus on one thing in life so much.
4) Then he moved to my physical appearance. He noticed the Mangalsutra that I was wearing and asked me if I was married. Continued with questions like Why do I wear Sindur so prominently? Am I from UP or somewhere?
5) Next set of questioning moved to what I do for living. I told him I work on a contract basis 5 hours a day with an MNC on which he started posing questions like "Is 5 hours sufficient? What if it doesn't work out with your husband in future, how will you survive? Have you thought it out? What is your goal/purpose in life?”
6) He was also very interested in family planning asking questions like “Why I don’t have kids?”. He said he wondered what kind of parents I have who don't even push me for conceiving. He kept probing on this point saying he needs to check if I am planning a child or not to assess if it safe to prescribe an Xray, but that clearly wasn't the case. I felt massively uncomfortable, he still went on with it. He said sarcastically "What an intelligent decision. Had someone advised me this at your age, I wouldn't have had 2 daughters. It's so much of trouble to raise kids".
These were merely highlights of the discussions. He made me feel that I was living purposelessly, that I haven't achieved much in life, that I was wasting time and he questioned each of my life choices. ** **** ****** ** ****** *********** ********* ********* *************** disrespectful, unempathetic and judgemental. He may be qualified at his work but extremely lacking in attitude and handling of patients.
While one would say that I should have walked out without getting any treatment, I could not muster courage to do so given I was in physical pain with my back issue and urgently needed diagnosis. Further, as one would understand in a physician-patient relationship, it is the physician who sits in a position of power as he has knowledge, and the patient is apparently ignorant. Therefore, I played along thinking it to be harmless at that time. My upbringing, having seen my parents putting doctors on a pedestal, also did not help in this case at that moment. I have been hard-wired since childhood to be respectful, nice and assume positive intent. I wish I could give back on his face instead of being nice.
However, after I left the clinic, I felt so abused mentally that I started crying on my way back silently promising myself to never go back to this doctor (who by the way had also advised me for follow-ups).
Apologies for a long post, but this was needed to ensure that no other patients need to face such humiliation from such medical professionals.
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