The media paints sex as easy and hot and makes it look like everyone but you is having loads of sex. Everyone has sexual problems at some point. Couples have sexual problems that are often easily fixed. Young newlyweds have sexual adjustment problems. Those with young children are often exhausted with the new roles of responsibility and have trouble keeping the bedroom separate leading to fights. Older couples struggle with menopause and old resentments against each other that shuts down intimacy. Couples are often unable to solve these intimate issues on their own because of disappointment, hurt, anger, resentment, accusations, their own inhibitions, etc.
Sex therapy helps couples talk about sex with each other in a non judgemental manner.
A professionally trained therapist helps you address thesexual concern is a safe and supportive environment. It does not involve any type of sexual or physical interaction with the therapist. Sextherapists are not judges and the goal of treatment is helping the couples workout their sexual differences in ways that both people feel satisfied. Blaming each other for thesexual problem is discouraged. Instead of just treating the affected individual,the couple is treated as it is the relationship that is affected. This helps gain the co-operation and understanding of both the partners in overcoming the problem.
The fear of performance and pressure are often central to most cases of sexual dysfunction. This is removed initially by banning sexual intercourse. Couples are then helped to rediscover the sensual pleasures of touching and being touched without the goal of intercourse per se (Sensate Focus Exercise). All the sense organs are to be used to create a situation conducive to sexual response and pleasure; touch being the most essential sense.
Explaining the anatomy and physiology of individual sexual response cycles to the couple also has important therapeutic benefits and helps resolve undue expectations. Sextherapists keep a balance between warmth and professionalism that makes talking about sex more comfortable for clients of both the genders. However there are firm ethical boundaries about NOT entering a sexual relationship with anyclient. Again, sex therapy never includes sex with the therapist.
Do I need to consult a therapist who is a doctor?
Yes, it is of utmost importance to identify and rule out any organic conditions that might require medical treatment instead of sex therapy.