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Traits of my friend
My friend(male) comes from a dysfunctional family, has childhood trauma, tremendous mood swings, ghosts people, sometimes zone out, gets bored of people, tolerates them as long as they align with his choices, takes his friends taken for granted and he thinks they will understand him even without communication.He thinks communication is through reels and memes. He says he is difficult to deal with. Emotionally unavailable. Always do things as per his convenience. Too much into Instagram for validation of his content. Pulls away when people get too close hence never sustained a close relationship. What is wrong with him? Is his friendship or relationship healthy for others?
Answers (10)
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Hi
If you want to be his best friend stay in his life, ask him to continue Intervention plan
Next Steps
mindfulness therapy (individual level)
Health Tips
let's discuss under relationship therapy session
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It seems to be PTSD, due to childhood psychological traumas.
It may lead to bipolar tendency or trait.
It needs to be addressed asap otherwise it may get complicated.
It can be well treated with counseling sessions and homeopathic medicine effectively.
It needs to be treated in a holistic approach for complete recovery.
He needs an expert Psychologist who is a good homeopathic physician.
Next Steps
I have been working as a Homeopathic Psychiatrist and Counseling psychologist for the last 17 years. You can contact me through an online appointment for further assistance
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Hi
Your friend shows signs of emotional dysregulation, avoidant attachment, and possibly traits linked to personality vulnerabilities—all of which often stem from childhood trauma and dysfunctional family dynamics. Zoning out, mood swings, ghosting, needing control, and using humor or content instead of real communication suggest he may be using defense mechanisms to avoid vulnerability and emotional closeness.
This kind of friendship or relationship is usually exhausting for the other person, because it becomes one-sided—you give, he disappears, you wait, he returns on his terms. Unless he actively seeks help and works on emotional availability, it’s not a healthy relationship for others, and it can cause emotional confusion, self-doubt, or burnout in those who care.
Take therapy, and you can connect with me on nine two six six seven two six zero six five.
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Hi,Ask him to get professional help from a psychologist
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Your friend sounds like he’s been through a lot. trauma, mood swings, emotional disconnection and he’s navigating life in a way that protects him but isolates others. It’s not about something being “wrong” with him, but more about unhealed stuff that’s spilling into his relationships.
Being close to someone like that can be emotionally exhausting. So while he would definitely benefit from therapy to unpack all this, you might also find value in talking to someone, not to fix him, but to better understand your boundaries, reactions, and how to support him without losing yourself in the process.
Sometimes the healthiest relationships start when both people are doing the inner work, side by side.
Next Steps
Consult online
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Ms. Pooja Gupta
Counselling Psychologist
8 yrs exp
Delhi
Hi,
Your friend's behavior suggests that he may be grappling with significant emotional wounds rooted in childhood trauma and a dysfunctional family background, which have contributed to his mood swings, emotional unavailability, and difficulty forming deep, trusting relationships. His tendency to ghost people, zone out, and tolerate others only when they align with his preferences indicates possible attachment issues and a fear of vulnerability. Reliance on reels and memes for communication, along with seeking validation through Instagram, points to his struggle with genuine emotional expression and self-esteem. His pattern of pulling away when others get too close and taking friends for granted suggests that his relationships may not be healthy or balanced, often leaving others feeling neglected or misunderstood. Overall, he appears to be dealing with unresolved emotional challenges that affect his ability to connect meaningfully. For his well-being and for healthier relationships, it might be beneficial for him to seek professional help to address underlying trauma, develop emotional resilience, and learn healthier ways of relating to others.
Next Steps
consult
Health Tips
seek help
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Dear friend,
Appreciate your concern and your observation about your friend..
If possible, book a session with a psychological Counselor on behalf of him..
Let him talk it loud about his past situations and let him vent out all his pented up emotions with a professional..
Maybe, he could get a clarity and understanding about himself first, so that he could understand others..
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Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Psychologist
13 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hi... It appears you are deeply hurt and concerned about your own mental health as well as your friend's. If his personality or behaviors are troubling you beyond a point you may choose to maintain some distance, emotionally and socially. As per your description, yes his friendship may be toxic and unhealthy for you. Also, be mindful of not falling for someone who is treating you badly. Almost all toxic relationship begin with a cycle of abuse, detachment, and attachment. It is unhealthy, toxic, and exploitative in most cases. Listen, to your gut feeling and act accordingly. You may seek professional help to make better choices in your life.
Next Steps
Consult a Psychologist.
Interpersonal Relationship Counselling is required.
Health Tips
Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Senior Psychologist
Cell: nine six seven one three zero three one three four
Website: https://gunjanmaithil.wixsite.com/therapy
App: http://wix.to/fechb08?ref=cl
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Sanjana Purdhani
Psychologist
2 yrs exp
Delhi
Your friend seems to be struggling deeply, likely due to unresolved trauma and emotional dysregulation. His behaviorâzoning out, emotional detachment, pushing people away when it gets too closeâoften comes from a place of protection, not malice. But that doesnât make it less painful for those around him. You might be feeling unseen, confused, and emotionally drained, especially if youâve been trying to hold space without receiving much in return.
Next Steps
Acknowledge whatâs true for you: If this friendship is feeling one-sided or toxic, itâs okay to step back. Set emotional boundaries: You can care for someone without carrying their emotional chaos. If heâs open, gently encourage therapy or self-workânot as a fix, but as a support. Ask yourself honestly: Is this friendship nourishing me, or just exhausting me?
Health Tips
Youâre not responsible for healing him. Love and loyalty should never cost your peace. You can choose empathy and distance. A healthy relationship (friendship or romantic) requires mutual effort, communication, and emotional availability. If those are absent, it's okay to redefine the relationship or walk away.
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