Divorce, anger, no faith in relations.

My father expired when I was 5. My house wife Mom &a elder sister got alone. From childhood I use to hear the blame that it was because of my unlucky/bad horoscope my father expired Continued torture Mother has constant fights, shouts with her family . Sometimes for money, sometimes just interfering to other lives. And all the people both relatives & neighbors complaint to me about her character, shouts I have a problem like I can't remember anything for long I just remember some of the most unpleasant moments of life No good memories as such I grew up seeing failing/ bad married relationships. Of my mothers siblings My father's relatives seldom talk with us So I agree I had a fear whether I will also get a bad husband. But I swear I also dreamt of a actual life partner, friend, father and loving husband But I married a wrong person. I could have stopped it before marriage. But this family status stuff. I married then divorced Now I fear if I wil fail again