Child sexual abuse. Contrl. pls help!

There are two ways of looking at this. You can either laugh it off saying that it was just a misadventure of two immature children, and then ignore the whole thing, or you can take it too seriously and make a mess of everybody's lives. You were a seven or eight year old child then, but remember even your cousin was not really that old. He was an immature adolescent may be around fourteen. So both of you were children, and both were immature. Apart from you feeling guilty about it now, nothing really damaging had happened. I do not think even the law would take it seriously because he was also a child at that time. My sincere suggestion would be for you to forgive him and to forgive yourself too. There is no need to feel so guilty about it. Just take it as a passing immature childhood behavior which does not deserve your attention now. I do not think there is any need to discuss such things with your fiance either. But if you are still not able to get over it, please consult a psychiatrist in person. He will help you with medication and some counseling.

I personally feel just to focus on ur future, ur relation, everything has a time, leave the thing from mind, increase some mental work, focus on ur hobbies. Revenge might land u to more trouble as u also involved in it for a long. Focus on other things, if not possible, take some counselling. Best wishes