Feels ashamed of myself as I type this.My cousin-brother(8years elder), used to touch my privates when I was in 3rd std it continued to my adulthood(almost 18) and don't know why I didn't feel that right,maybe coz I felt good.Later he used to approach but my reflexes used to stop him.(mostly occured at night and during family gatherings when all people used to sleep together coz of lack of space,I stupidly chose to sleep beside him) Still my stupid mind thought he was good cousin coz he is frenly with members of my family and everyone likes him.I thought he was one good bro. Uff.Real problem now is, I am in love with really nice guy to whom I confessed everything.He was shocked and took me to bitter reality. I have starred to repent a lot. Feel like hell and worthless. He is married to his 8year GF now nd settled in US. (yes he was in a relnship)I can't bear his happiness, feels like texting his wife everything.But my dad's name and dignity stoping me.afraid I may lose contrl.pls help
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There are two ways of looking at this. You can either laugh it off saying that it was just a misadventure of two immature children, and then ignore the whole thing, or you can take it too seriously and make a mess of everybody's lives. You were a seven or eight year old child then, but remember even your cousin was not really that old. He was an immature adolescent may be around fourteen. So both of you were children, and both were immature. Apart from you feeling guilty about it now, nothing really damaging had happened. I do not think even the law would take it seriously because he was also a child at that time.
My sincere suggestion would be for you to forgive him and to forgive yourself too. There is no need to feel so guilty about it. Just take it as a passing immature childhood behavior which does not deserve your attention now. I do not think there is any need to discuss such things with your fiance either. But if you are still not able to get over it, please consult a psychiatrist in person. He will help you with medication and some counseling.
I personally feel just to focus on ur future, ur relation, everything has a time, leave the thing from mind, increase some mental work, focus on ur hobbies. Revenge might land u to more trouble as u also involved in it for a long. Focus on other things, if not possible, take some counselling. Best wishes
I can understand what you are going through , there is no need to feel guilty as you were too young to understand this complex issue, I can see that now you feel very angry towards your cousin which is understandable because being more elder then you he should have restrained himself, speaking to his wife or him is going to make matters worse, I would advise you to forgive him and forget about this issue and move forward in life, it is difficult but not impossible
Forgive and forget
Don't act out in anger
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